how long has it been since i downloaded this thing? Anyway, what has happened these past few days.. OMG I"M GOING TO MALAYSIA THIS FRIDAY!! OMGOMG. Teehee. Somethign stupid i did today, that i regret saying, but i say stupid things everyday so it shouldn't really bother me right? I think as a ploy since i didn't want to do the sunday school evaluations, and there weren't enough I reasoned that i wasn't present for sunday school enough to give an accurate evaluation of the sunday school which was totally true and Tom who is one of the sfc sponsors was like all how come you're not filling out an evaluation, and i explained that i wasn't here enough to fill one out he was like WHAT?! and immediately i regretted what I said, but the thing is, it's true, but i dunno... maybe i should have filled one of those things out. i dunno. :P I've been doing nothing and studying the whole day. and the weekend. Oh we had a christmas party on friday after sfc, it was hecka fun. (haahaa like thenorcal lingo?) anyway, yeah it was really fun. i studying on saturday and today, i'm gonna study some more tomorrow and tuesday and wednesday morning 'cause i just LOVE to study calculus. i think ima get a B in that class, even though a b isn't bad and i don't need to get a 4.0 in college, but still, it's the principle of the wholething. hold up.. it's not the principle of the whole thing. it's just the fact that i can't stand having anything less than an A if i try for it. and believe me, i've tried to get an A in this class. even if i do rock the final, i think ima get an A-, maybe not, so to rock the final, i gotta study study study, and go to the rsf to relieve that stress and study more and maybe take some vitamin b pills to calm the nerves and sleep and study and study and study some more.

I GOT AN A I GOT AN A. :) :D Anyway, less than a week and them I get to go home. :) Less than a week and I can go online. :) only a ween until i'm on a plane flying over the Pacific to a muslim country, scary huh? But pretty cool. guess what the temperature is like in malaysia... 70 degrees F and 90 percent humidity. THat's always gonna be fun. Feels good to have 2 finals done and only 1 to go. Praise God. This is totally His gift to me and yeah.. wow. :) Man.. feels good. :) It feels like i don't have to study for this one, but then again, that's not good, 'cause math is what i'm worried about, so just as my dad says, just gotta push the pencil.

Chem final tomorrow. :(

If I were a work of art, I would be Claude Monet's Waterlilies. I am soft and gentle, but very colourful. Although based in reality, I look at the world through a filter of impressions which shape how I see things. Splashes of light help to define my presence and bring an endearing quality. Which work of art would you be? The Art Test

:)

207 out of 350 on a practice chem final. i'm just happy its not the real thing. I know i can do better and i wasn't really giving 100 percent, but that's just a little discouraging. but the thing is, it just tells me that i gotta study a bit more. do a lot of practice problems, you know? i'm in the middle of my break. been taking the chem final and as soon as the washers downstairs open up, ima put laundry in and eventually start studying again. it's crunch time now and yeah gotta study. but i dun't wanna. :P
"Hark the Herald Angels Sing, Glory to the Newborn King
Peace on earth and mercy triumph God and sinners reconciled
joyful all ye nations rise, join the triumph of the skies
with angelic host proclaim, Christ is Born in bethlehem
Hark the herals Angels sing, Glory to the Newborn King."

It's Norcal vs. Socal. THey're tired 10-10 and only a couple seconds left on the clock. Someone shoots the ball and roz catches it. (that in itself is a miracle) She shoot and SHE SCORES!!! HER ONE AND ONLY BASKET OF THE DAY. and it WINS THE GAME!! WHAT AN AMAZING PLAY! yeah, that was the high point of my day. teehee. It was all down hill from there.. hm.. maybe not. i think my nap that i'm going to take is gonna be a small highlight considering i've been studying. :( So yeah, finals coming up. I'm a bit nervous taking a final thats worth 35 percent of my grade, but it's all good right? Chem is all i'm studying right now. save me from the mild madness. i get to go home in less than 2 weeks. :) 12 days exactly. happy christmas from me to you. :)

"Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance, and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrew 12:1-2
Here's another one
"My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the LORD, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; for those whome the LORD loves he disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He recieves." Hebrews 12:5b-6
Question that was raised in our hbs small group: What's the difference between discipline and punishment?

Taking a break from studying chemistry. Playing for worship tomorrow at sfc, a bit nervous 'cause i'm not sure if my skills are good enough. a lot is expected from me, and i hope that during worship, God will be pleased with me. i'm in the mood for some sushi. yesterday was a good day. :)

oh yeah.. what did i do today? went to church, slept, studied.

Have you ever wondered how expendable you were? I wonder how important I am... if i disappeared one day, would people come and get me? Life would go on if I died, and in the big picture, I don't really matter. Have you ever felt like that? I wish i could do something for the masses to remember me, but that's just superficial appreciation or just seeking negative attention which isn't healthy.. I know i should base my identity and everything on the fact that I'm God's child and that I have eternal life and by that, i am free and i matter, but it's hard not to hold people's opinions of you high you know? I guess you don't have to do something and get the mob to worship you or just at least remember your name, but you know.. i dunno.. actually I wouldn't really want to have a bad reputation, but to have EVERYONE i dunno that'd be hard. Yeah i remember a lot of my teachers didn't know me very well 'cause i didn't talk that much. Do i still not talk much? probably. Haahaa it's was sorta funny.. for the longest time my uncle didn't think i could talk until one day when i was five i talked and he was like.. wow she can talk. Weird huh? I guess it depends on who's present.. i'll be more or less talkative. and when i'm comfortable, i can be stupid and crazy and sometimes i get embarassed easily, but sometimes i don't. it depends... is that the same for you? kind of in the mood for some cup noodles. I was gonna run today, but it hailed and i dunno.. i feel like some cup noodles. :P My sweater duster smelled like food, but some sprays of bath and body works anti bac helped, but then it would be better to actually wash it, but it's new.. i was just stupid and took it to aculpoco and ordered the skillet with spattering oil and STEAK. man i miss steak. anyway back to the insignificant thing. I think... how significant am i? For a while, i wondered if i just stopped coming to church, would people notice i wasn't there? i guess that's the mindset of a visitor, or a really lazy person who just doesn't really wanna take the initiative and talk to people. Partially why i don't talk is because when approached... sometiems i can't really find somehting to say or a question to ask and if i say something there's this fear that what i'm saying makes no sense which has happened to me.. or someone has laughed at me which has happened or my conversation topic dies which makes me feel stupid. Hm... looks like oversensitivity to me. Welcome to my brain.

Ok.. the pictures.. i'm havin some trouble. to be honest.. i have no idea to post pictures. :P If anyone knows.. feel free to email me. Taking a break from studying. Man... acid and base problems are hard. Either that, I have no idea what i'm doing. :P Today it was a nice change, i studied at the I-house with christina and sammy.
Oh here's a chem question:
What is the pH of .1L of .1 M HCOOH + .1 L of .1 M NaOH and then diluted to 1 L?
Yeah.. the pictures are gonna come later.. when i find out how to add pics. haahaa. Anyway, back to studying. Now on to.. REDOX REACTIONS!!!

You wanna know something weird? Our phone works sometimes and doesn't work sometimes. Weird. Today, one of my floormates has a guitar so i was just jamming in my room.. worshipping God. It was amazing. I love music, I love to play guitar and I love to worship. Especially when you're hungry and only focused on God. Fasting is a good discipline... Jesus fasted for 40 days. It causes one to not be consumed by eating, but to draw back from this human trait and observe and meditate on what God has taught.. it allows one to observe and it take so much discipline. Today during HBS, Stacy brought cookies and milk..man.. was I hungry. Tomorrow for lunch, ima break the fast. But for now... it's just reflection, observation and meditation. time to sleep. check out the pictures! more to come soon. :) bye!

our phone doesn't work.. sad. need to get a new phone. :P
i got a new template, like it? i like the font and stuff, but i need to go to target or something and get a new phone. Anyway i'm fasting today.. at dinner time.. so after this post.. ima have an extended quiet time and prayer time.
Does anyone know how much you can get a guitar for? I dunno.. some people got theirs used for 100 and some people got theirs new for a lot more, but I don't have my guitar and it'd be so nice to have one, you know? I dunno..it'll be a christmas wish? And today I saw 2 greyhounds.. they're so small and skinny and they looked so scared. Yesterday on the bus, i saw a seeing eye dog.. it was SOOO CUTE. I was thinking... if i could extend this blog section and make another one for pictures.. that would be SO COOL. HHHHHhhhhmm.. :) yeah... maybe i'll do that. :)
Anyway, signing out...

oh haahaa.. didn't realize the passage was already on the webpage. :)

::attention:: ::ATTENTION:: my dorm phone doesn't work so for those of you who know my cell number, call my cell from now on. :) For those of you who don't know my cell number, e-mail me 'cause i don't wanna announce it to the whole world by posting it onto a website. Anyway, being on lockdown is actually pretty relaxing. I was sitting here for a while 'cause i didn't know what to do.. 'cause i couldn't chat, and i finished hw and stuff for today so yeah.. it was nice. :) i noticed that chem 3a is a really impacted course, so... i'm thinking of just taking chem 1b and the 112 series to get a better foundation in biochemistry 'cause i wanna go into pharmacy and that's what they deal with, right? RIGHT?! If anyone has any advice.. please do. I welcome it. And being stupid, i forgot my Bible at home, so like i don't have a Bible so i'm restricted to going onto the computer and doing my quiet time off of the Bible Gateway website. :( It kinda sucks 'cause i like to leave nigel (he's precious to me, yes, but God is more so) and spend time just God and i. i'm almost done with the psalms... anyone have any suggestion for what to go through next during sacred times? if not, ima go through proverbs. one chapter a day or something.. then Isaiah, lots of prophecy lots of good stuff. Maybe Jerehmiah (spelling?) and other prophets after that.
Yeah, i'm writing this 'cause a friend, kindly reminded me to update my blog 'cause apparently if i'm not on aim.. i'm completely shut off from the world. That shouldn't be. If you're not online, you should have more of a social life 'cause you're actually interacting with people.. or you're like me and find another impersonal form of communication like writing a blog. Interesting things to think about.
yupyup.
Have I shared my favorite passage yet? If i have, the Bible is good and repetition is good.
"Rejoice in the Lord always, Again I will say rejoice! Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God which surpasses all comprehension will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:4-7
May the words of God bless you.

You're wondering why at 2 in the morning? Well... I'm on lockdown right now.. need to work on it 'cause i spend the night watching friends. Not a good idea. i'm a bit tired right now.. procrastinating. I think i have a lot of work tomorrow...not a very good sign.

STINKIN TIRED is what roz is right now. Maybe it's not the best idea to be writing on the blog, huh? hm... Oh well.. i got time. That's what they all say, yeah.. but soon ima be in the hospital for a broken hip 'cause i tripped down the stairs talking on my cell again and this time it's the hip 'cause i never really got around to eating calcium when i was my age. Weird thought huh? Yeah you better be saying that. In times of extremes the brilliance in people comes out... do you believe that? I dunno.... it's an interesting thought but not always true. Right now, i'm at the extreme.. extremely tired, but there's nothing brilliant coming out of my mouth.. just random ramble.. RAMBLE I TELL YOU. Yeah.. i'm crazy... crazy tired. time to go to sleep.
Song of the day
Let your Glory Fall
LISTEN TO IT.

I think i'm feeling a bit under the weather. :P
gonna sleep.

i'm home. it feels so good to be home, but one stupid thing i forgot to do... i forgot to bring my glasses home.. stupid, huh? better not forget when i come home for christmas. that'd be sad. yeah.. thanksgiving is over and now its time for the holiday season to start. :) no.. just kidding... this is the holiday season.. a time to give thanks. My thoughts are probably very simple, very childlike, but we shouldn't just have a day put aside just to give thanks. that's a bit ludicrus and tells a foreigner what kind of people the americans are who only give thanks on one day of the year when they're blessed with so much. anyway.. there is a lot to give thanks for... there's a lot to give thanks for every day... so yeah i'm not gonna type up a long list.. it'll just be thanks to God in my prayers and meditations. :)
Anyway... don't have high speed internet and we don't even have 2 phone lines and i'm a bit tired. God bless! And every day in everything, Give Thanks to the LORD. :)

GOING HOME TODAY!! GOING HOME!!!!!!!! :-D :-D

It's about 4 in the morning. Why am I up? Have no idea why...
but it's wednesday morning at 4. this means only one thing.. i'm going home in less than 24 hours. looked forward to this day so much... get to go home home.
You know.. i feel like i'm still in high school... like i'm still 16 or something because it feels as if none of my emotions have changed... my motives for doing things are still as selfish as they were 2 years ago.. and i'm still as immature as i was then. But you think... isn't college supposed to be a time of maturing? Perhaps. I'm never aware of times of growth unless i look back and say.. i was so immature what was i thinking.. like when i was 12.. i criticized myself when i was 7 'cause i did this stupid embarassing dance in front of this guy i liked.. anyway that's in the past. Now i think back to when i was 16.. there are some things i regret.. but a lot of the things, i just reason saying it's just me trying to be young. There's nothing wrong with being young 'cause when you're 30 people will think you're in your early twenties. I just don't know... if my actions reflect those of a teenage high school girl.. then what about my Spiritual Walk with God? what about my emotional and academic growth? Some things to ponder over at 4 in the morning as i prepare to go home.. dunno why.. i'm not even packing. Pack tomorrow.. not going to class.. most of them are cancelled anyway. tomorrow.tomorrow i'l loveyou tomorrow. it's only a day away.

What's the agenda?!
1. Quiet Time
2. Chem Studying.
3. shower
4. sleepy time.

Now for the true time waster stuff.
I COME HOME ON WEDNESDAY!!!!!! :-D Yeah... anyway. Today has been good. Totally relaxed and yet so productive. Don't you just love those days? Yeah.. so my research paper: African American Blues influence on James Baldwin for an Asian American Studies class. I mean.. what's with that? It doesn't even feel like an asian american studies class.. more like an ethnic studies class.
Oh prayer request: Pray for my ochem class situation. The lecture/labs are full.. pray that whatever God wants i'll do. If he wants me to take ochem next semester pray that it would open up (this is what i want) If it's not God's will... pray that I will not be bitter or angry and change my wants to what God wants, and to be in his will. Yeah? Thanks! :)
TO STUDY!

HI.
Last night, this morning at approx 1:38 am to 3:00 am was one of the most amazing things i've ever seen in my life. METEOR SHOWER. It was so clear and I was up at the clark kerr track. Usually it's really creepy up there 'cause it's all dark and it's QUIET.. but lots and lots of people were there. and yeah the shooting stars were amazing. It was just totally a reflection of God's glory and majesty that he would create something as beautiful as this. :) This year has been cool. :) First a lightning storm that rocked the house and a meteor shower. Very cool.
Manipulation... Is it possible for everyone to be manipulative or are there people who can't stop and people who just can't manipulate people? Interesting question without an answer. Sometimes I think i'm very manipulative and it's true. But i've never really thought of what it's like for the person to be manipulated until today. I didn't get manipulated or hurt or anything but was just thinking about that. You can totally hurt someone and belittle them and I dunno.. that's not edifying to God's body. gotta do hw. be back later with more.

FRIDAY....
the weekend is here.. and in just a couple days, a LONG weekend is coming up. :) LONG. a weekend where I can sit in front of the tv and veg and do what? CROSSTITCH. :) Ok.. i've been working on this project for my discipler Karen, but she moved away in lets see... June right? it's been like 5 months...and i still haven't finished.. partially 'cause it's detailed work.. little stitches of the lyrics and music of Amazing Grace.. but it's bigger than i thought, so Karen, if you're reading this.. actually.. forget what i jsut said 'cause you're not supposed to know. :P
Anyway, today at fellowship we had a worship workshop. There were 2 worship times at the begining and end and 2 seminars. The first one I went to was a guitar one taught by Sammy Lee. We learned how to HAMMER, MUFFLE and PICK. Fun words teehee... but yeah it was fun. I knew how to play since like 8th grade and lead worship but i never had my own guitar.. maybe its time to get one. :) And the second one was taugh by Scott Eng, the attitude of worship. He taught that one should approach worship with reverence as in Isaiah 6, but also obedience crying out.. here I am. send me. Worship for me is bowing down to God and acknowleding His Supremeness.. as Scott said.. His Godness..We are broken and only through Him with his strength and power we find joy peace and confidence. When I worship.. i've struggled with focusing on just God and only Him and when my mind is focused on giving my all.. praising him with my whole being, it's Amazing and i can feel the Spirit just filling me up.. like that song: Come and Fill me Up. I love music, so music is a way to worship the Almighty. I like to study so my grades and academics are a way for me to worship the Almighty.. realizing and being thankful for the freedom to learn at this university and to just do my best as a witness even though a lot of people who aren't christian do their best and still get like PhDs and stuff. Yeah.. like the song Hungry goes: "broken i come to you for i know You satisfy.." this is how I come go God. I know i am not whole.. i am broken and i come humbled into the amazing whiteness, glory and majesty of the most high. There are glipses of God's perfection in his creation and I witnessed that when I went to Europe. There are so many pictures, so many paintings so many landmarks that humans have build with their hands.. it's amazing. I have pictures so if you know me.. ask to see my pictures. :) also the mountains. Lots of worship songs.. i lift my eyes up to the mountains where does my help come from. :) Did you feel the mountains tremble.. the mountains are majestic.. mighty.. lasting.. just a teensy 1 in avogadro's number the size of God's glory. yeah i have pictures of the swiss alps too... very sound of music-ish. so anyway.. i love to worship. :)
sorry.. sam's blog is www.notorioussam.blogspot.com i think.

THURSDAY.........
the day that comes before friday and immediately following wednesday.. my goodness, today was one of the longest days.. couldn't sleep last night.. don't know why.. wasn't on a coffee high or anything just couldn't sleep. And today in chem lab guess what we had to do.. TITRATIONS!!!! so tedious.
go to my friend sam liu's blog.. www.notoriussam.blogspot.com or somethin... his journal entry is so encouraging. :)

Emotions are my hubris... is that what it is.. tragic fault? yeah. I let emotions take over my thoughts, giving whatever I'm thinking about free reign over my mind which is unhealthy and yeah.. harmful.. same diff. I pray that the God of the Universe in his all glory and majesty take my heart, form it and guard it... for my heart belongs only to the Most High. If someone does come along, may this godly man love God as much as I and love God more than me. May God grant me patience with this and with my emotions.
What else? Discipline.. something I take pride in. Perhaps maybe to the extreme. Is there an extreme in Discipline? not sure.. but anything extreme can't be profitable.. moderation is taught to be the right way to go. A lot of times I worry that I'm rubbing this pride in other people's faces... perhaps it's somethign I need to work on, to be humble. A lot of times when i try to be humble... it feels like fake modesty which is wrong, too... that's like knowing that you're good but you say you aren't, you know? Being truly humble means to know that you have this skill, but using it for God's glory, not to use it for personal advancement.. you know? YOU KNOW?!!?? haahaa.. (sorry stupid comic relief joke not the right timing) But yeah in all seriousness.. humility is a Gift from God not to be taken lightly, not to be abused, but to be used in the advancement of His kingdom.

Midterm turned out to be easier than expected... that can be a bad sign, but that's ok. This week is a study week.. must get into the groove of studying and then a break for a week before finals come around... It's worth it.
Have you ever wondered if your talking annoyed the person you were talking to? So many times, I'm afraid that online, I'm being annoying or something...dunno.
One more week...

The beauty of the Lord astounds me,
When I wake up, the sun greets me with warmth
That only could have been created by the most high.
Every evening, the sunset bids goodnight
With beauty so rich that a million diamonds cannot match.

For who am I to judge the beauty of the Lord
but the Lord to judge the beauty of his creation
The glow in an infant's cheeks,
the twinkle in a dying man's eye
wrinkles reflecting years of weathered storms.

Magazines give us the world's view on the beautiful
the prettiness they proclaim is only "skin deep"
The lovely aren't always beautiful
They are those one can love
Those with the extra tissue for your nose
Those with the words that can subdue any sob

The lovely are those sent by God
With the warmth of the sun, the reflection of the moon
to guide us to Jesus' perfection.

Ahh... tonights my relaxing night.. just gotta chill and relax before the midterm. This midterm.. there's a lot of difficult stuff like Gibbs free energy and equilibrium constants and le Chatelier's principle.. say that a lot.. it sounds REALLY REALLY cool. haahaa like L'Hospital's rule. Man.. i'm such a nerd. Haahaa... Anyway, today i spent like the WHOLE stinkin day studying.. first with chem hw.. then a chem review session.. then sitting in a cafe waiting for my chem ta to come by for office hours not knowing that he moved his office hours to Latimer (a chem building on campus) so yeah.. just read.. Oh what was really cool. I ordered a hot chocolate and i didn't have my wallet so the guy gave me a hot cocoa for free! isn't that so cool? Cafe Milano people are nice. Yupyup.. oh what sucked today. I rode the bus to the RSF (the recreational sports facility) but it was CLOSED for veteran's day. >_< so i thought.. i'll just run back.. wow.. such a workout.. but I think i'm getting a spare tire, not that i'm superficial or anything. :P Yeah
Everytime before a midterm, I always seem to get really nervous, but whatever happens, it's in God's sovereign will. Every grade is a good gift from God and it's meant for learning and meant for His glory which is what we all should aim for you know? Everything should be a form of Worship to God. Let everything in life should revolved around the Almighty because he is the creator and deserves nothing less. This is headknowledge i know, but I'm struggling with heart realization. To be at peace in everything I do. To bear fruit in whatever comes into my life.. to EVERYTHING in my life. Someone said I had self discipline, but if you achieve that... putting God first and only first takes so much discipline. Discipline and trust that I'm praying for and striving for.

Well, it's Sunday and I have a midterm on Tuesday. Not really wanting to study... HEY! I'll write my blog! Anyway... an interesting question that one of my floormates asked me today. She asked about my ankle 'cause I sprained it a couple months ago. She asked if i went to the Tang Center (the health center) and what they did to me. And then she asked, so are you gonna sue the university? And i was like.. HUH?! Why should I? I'm fine now, and it's not like the construction of the Dwinelle Hall steps are faulty. I was talkin on my stinkin cell phone. That's actually sorta funny... How'd you sprain your ankle? Oh, I fell down some stairs while talking on my cell phone. haahaa. Anywho, yeah i'm like, I don't see a reason 'cause i'm better now. And she's like.. what if you didn't heal, think of the people you can save by sueing.. and i'm like.. I prefer not to think about stuff like that. I dunno just got a bit weirded out. My thinking is: why go against the intitution that gives you the freedom of speech? Why go against the institution that houses you and gives you your education? Why just not be content? Anyway, just a conservative girl's point of view.. feel free to disagree. :P Yeah and a couple days ago...my roomate and some of our floor mates were watching this chinese cartoon thing and it was in mandarin and I realized I can't understand it. How sad is that? I'm chinese and I can't understand my own language. I dunno that's just sad. Maybe sometime in the near future, ima take chinese or somethin. yupyup. Anywho, back to studying for my midterm or doing math or music or asian am or something alone the lines of work. 1.5 WEEKS BAYBEE!!! :)

Hi.
You're probably gonna be like WHAT THE HECK?! But, tonight I had so much fun. Today I went to this brother's appreciation thing, where all of us girls from fellowship appreciate the guys and make dinner for them and stuff. It was really fun, we had a skit, it was a fifties theme and yeah it was really fun. :) The burgers were AMAZING. haahaa, this is the church I'm gonna stay at. It's a family here, it's a place where I could potentially feel at home. And the guys, it's really funny.. they made up a dance from grease, it was so funny and they all really got into it which was really cool. Everyone looked so good. :) And tonight.. we had a miniparty in my room. It started out with someone wanting hear this trance song, and then we ended up turning off the lights and raving, and dancing and stuff.. fun fun fun. :) We were like totally singing to the Lion King and dancing and stuff, it was really fun. You're probably wondering, why the difference from yesteray and today? Maybe I'm in my cycle. Anyway.. it's 2 in the morning. It would be a good idea to sleep. Till tomorrow.

Hey, Just got back from fellowship. It was cool 'cause today we had this combined thing with this group who are parents of college students, so its nice to know people from different fellowships. But I see people, and some people who've been here for a long time or who were born and raised in the church, they know everyone and they know all these inside jokes and stuff. To be honest, I'm not very good with large groups. It's a bit lonesome here, you can probably tell that I send a lot of time online partially because I don't hang out with friends. I don't really have a lot of friends up here or my friends are really busy, so it's a bit lonely. Just a week and a half until I go back home, to Torrance CA. It's a cozy city in southern California called Torrance. That's still home to me. I remember my sister said that i'll learn to call this place home. It's been 10 weeks and I don't feel at home. My biggest fear is going home and seeing that I've changed. I'm no longer at home when i'm home home and it's still not home here and yeah.. so I'm homeless, you know? I dunno, I just gotta pray that God will provide a friend or a group of friends, maybe a roomate or a couple. :) Maybe why I feel this way is 'cause i'm an introvert and quiet and people think I'm unfriendly and people are scared of me 'cause I'm a book work. Seriously, i didn't even realize I was a nerd until like junior year. But anyway, yeah.. it takes a while for me to make friends.. a LONG time. Anyway, i'm boring you i'm sure. Till tomorrow. :)

Hi. Yes yes I know if you're wondering.. this is Roz's take on the world, you'll see everything from my prespective. Anywho, gotta go to fellowship... i shall return.