Ever the Same

We were drawn from the weeds
We were brave like soldiers
Falling down under the pale moonlight
You were holding to me
Like a someone broken
And I couldn't tell you but I'm telling you now

Just let me hold you while you're falling apart
Just let me hold you and we'll both fall down

Fall on me
Tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you forever in me
Ever the same

-Rob Thomas

try this the next time you see a girl you like

girl: my brain can only go as far as 2 significant digits!

boy: [puts arm around girl] but you only NEED 2 significant digits.

LOL.

Random Brainfarts

1) 80% of my family is now on the East Coast. Have fun guys. I wish I were there. But then again, I'm enjoying the clear, cloudless sky at a nice fresh temperature of 65.

2) It dawned on me yesterday that shaving is totally a product of social norms. Why do women have to share their hairy areas when men don't? Not that I'm going to stop shaving, just throwing a question out into the cosmic void.

3) I learned yesterday that meconium is baby poo. It's this dark greenish colored matter that comes out of a baby's anus. But the thing is... it's not the composition of regular fecal matter. Regular fecal matter is composed of undigested food, bacterial debris and whatever the heck passes through the GI tract. In the conventional sense of the word, the environment in which a fetus occupies is completely void of any type of foreign microbe, the fetus doesn't ingest large amounts of solid food... or any food for that matter. So the only thing that can be pooed out is cellular debris from development. Imagine that.

4) Our Law and Ethics class today discussed physician assisted suicide. I took what seemed to be the unpopular stance in class. Do I have thoughts? No, I was too busy wondering what I should blog about. Just kidding, I'll take you out to lunch and we can talk.

5) Friendships are a tricky thing. When friends are far away, you can take one of 2 stances: Out of sight out of mind, absent physically but present in spirit. I experienced both very acutely this past weekend.

6) Struggling with what going down this summer. Internship? Missions? Leading a missions team? Working in Torrance? Working in San Francisco? Sitting on my butt and gaining so much fat that I have to be lifted with a crane? I dunno. Something definitely to keep in prayer.

done and done.

there are a couple things i've learned this week about myself:
1) Here are my priorities during test time: Studying, Sleep, Eating, God, People, cleanliness.
2) I'm under the impression that if I try to curb my eating, I'll somehow lose weight and become skinny and attractive.
3) I would rather do brainless productive crafty things than study.

This biochem test wasn't supposed to zap my energy.

Things are starting to crystallize in regards to getting involved at school/church.

Now What?

So I got my intern license. Now what?

I never thought I'd be uttering these words, but...I'm recruiting.

The only recruiting I knew was all the Haas students, dressed up in their power suits heading to the career center or the City to interview for that job to rake in the big bucks.

And no, I'm not switching to business. For the first 2 summers of pharm school, I have to work (or do an internship, whichever...). So yeah, now the onslaught starts. I just updated my resume to include some of the new stuff and my Anne Klein suit with express fitted shirt and snazzy UCSF portfolio is out of the closet (not ironed yet, but almost ready to go).

This process is daunting and my summer is more or less unscheduled. Should I stay in the Bay Area/San Francisco, or should I go back home to LA/Torrance? It could go both ways and I just need to give 100% and trust that God will let His plan unfold. Do I apply for a structured internship or just start working? How much do I want to be paid? How much do I want to learn? How far do I want to commute? (the thought of a >1 commute gives me chills).

Just Heavenly

Things that made this trip worthwhile
1) Falling significantly less.
2) Getting to know people I didn't know as well before.
3) Having Chinese Pride during our game of cranium:
a) Yelling: Ch-Ch-Ch-China!! randomly
b) When asked to identify a picture of a certain type of wheat, for a question my response was: "I only know what rice looks like!" (it may not be funny now, but it was funny at the time. maybe because we were so tired.)
c) There were five teams. 3 normal teams, team China and the Davids. 55% of the men on the trip were named David each with almost every Asian last name known to man: Chen, Lee, Peng, Tang, Young. And they HAD to make their own cranium team. And then it turned into "Heather and the Daves."

I don't have a picture of the slopes, so just replace the ocean with snowcapped mountains and the birds with people and that's that.

The quarter is a little heavier than last quarter. Something that I'm more aware of is my tiredness. Those who know me well can attest to the fact that I turn into Ms. Grumpy with less than 6hrs of sleep by the end of the day. That just means I need to turn up the discipline and pray every morning for strength to get through the day as an effective/functioning member of society and for a good night's rest every night.

Purity
I'm encouraged by this:
"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure." - 1 John 3:1-3

That's immensely encouraging.

Classes

I didn't pass my pchem waiver exam.

I wonder, though if I studied in vain and no matter how much I studied, I wouldn't have passed or if I didn't pass because I didn't take it seriously enough. I guess, subconsciously I wanted MORE work this quarter.

So, that means I won't be able to do things that I'd like to do like going to SFC retreat or WCC.

Oh the reason why I'm blogging at 9:40 am, BECAUSE CLASS DIDN'T START AT 9AM TODAY! So I'm kind of kicking myself for not looking at Tracy Fulton's schedule.

I think I need to rethink the whole not talking bit. I generally don't divulge info (like the fact that I'm a Christian) to the general public. Something seems so inherently wrong with that if I'm comissioned to put forth a good witness.

But I know why. I fear rejection and I fear what people think of me. I have trouble stomaching the verse where Jesus says the world will hate me because it hates Him. It's now 9:46am and I'm not completely awake yet. Perhaps I'll mull over it this weekend whilst on the beautiful white slopes of Heavenly, Lake Tahoe.

New Year

Back in the grind. This quarter is gonna be interesting (with respect to class). But last week was super fun.

Bert Lynn Middle School - Good to know that they still have fundraisers at Bonello's.

Friday was an AWESOME day for a sunset.

But then it started raining. So the Getty was a good choice. The mist made the garden THAT much prettier.

Happy New Year everyone. Celebrate responsibly.