Elves vs. Men A study of LOTR, metro-style

So i was watching Fellowship of the Ring and The Two Towers since I got home for break and I noticed something. All the elves are so very pretty. Beautifully groomed, well dressed, straightened hair. I bet you they even use moisturizer, exfoliant and sunscreen for their baby soft skin. Take Legolas, for example. You wouldn't know that he's really really really old. In fact, he looks like he's in his late 20's. (There's something in that elven water, i tell you) I noticed, all of the elves are hairless. Maybe there's something about beards that takes away from the womanly beauty that these elves strive for, even in battle. Something about them just screams metro.

The men, on the other-hand, are grunting, football-watching, lame cool-guy handshake doing pseudo-neanderthals that seem to attract the affections of both women and elven females. Some examples: Aragorn (Arwen and Eowyn), Faramir (good looking?), Eomer (he has good teeth which only appear when he gives his war cry. I know, it's a sad sad world). So why are these men so objectified by such women? What is it about that unshaven, uncut, ungroomed look that these women have grown to love? It's like outback jack vs. justin timberlake. Biologically, women are attracted to the unshaven, unshowered breed (if their BO doesn't repel too much) because of the pheomones. Who knows. I suppose everyone has their opinions.

At any rate. I'm ready for #3. Four hours and ten minutes of WHOOOO!!!!